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jeffstrauser@yahoo.com posted a comment on Saturday 27th January 2007 7:00am

OUTSTANDING CHAPTER!!!! I love this chapter. Nobody likes death, but why those particular students? I can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter. I noticed that Ginny didn't really have an reaction to Harry and Tonks being together, why? I liked the fact that 12 year old Harry was Ginny's patronus that was very cool and fitting. DO keep up the outstanding work and update soon please:):):):)

Crys replied:

I didn't pick those students for any particular reason.   Random casualties.

Ginny's known about Harry and Tonks since early in the story.   The two of them were bantering back and forth in letters very early and they have a conversation about Harry and Tonks early in chapter 21.

Thanks for reviewing

AcceleratedGlass posted a comment on Saturday 27th January 2007 5:42am

"Dementors don't run, they glide" -- the trial in book five during the interview with Mrs. Figg.

Ishtar posted a comment on Saturday 27th January 2007 5:36am

Re: Dementors - I went back and checked PoA, because I thought they'd come over the lake, but those scenes describe the dementors coming *around* the lake. Likewise, during the Quidditch scene, they're on the field, not flying above it. So they don't fly, and I have to go back and rewrite part of a story I'm working on. *sigh*

Re: The battle - I have a bit of difficulty with the description of the battle. The Quidditch pitch is to the northwest of the castle, and the entrance to the castle faces west. The Forbidden Forest is east of the castle. There is a very large stretch of open space between the forest and the pitch. Your description of the battle has the forest far too close to the pitch, with the dementors coming out of the forest to directly threaten the students leaving the pitch, and deez in the forest close enough to shoot spells at Harry. (See the maps located at the HP Lexicon - all but one show the Pitch and the Forest in opposite directions from the castle, and the one that doesn't was made well before JKR released her own sketch map.)

Re: Carmen Ryder? Do we watch Japanese superhero series, perhaps? Or is this an unintentional pun?

Crys replied:

Dementors: Um, sorry (?) that you'll have to re-write something, Dorothy.

Pitch and Forest layout: [pause] Damn.   Er . . . yeah. [sheepish shrug]

Carmen Ryder: That name's used somewhere?   If it's a copy, it's inadvertent.

DJ posted a comment on Saturday 27th January 2007 3:03am

This was a cool chapter I like what yoo did with the DA. Also it looks like Ron pulled his head part way out of his A*S nice to see. Thanks for writting I look foward to the rest.

ponderous stibbons posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 6:29pm

Albus' response was a pleasant surprise. The tone of it, especially.

Glad Hermione got credit for leading the DA. I think she led it better than Harry would ever have done - presumably because she's a details-oriented person, smarter than Harry, has fewer burdens, and lacking the "do-it-alone" tendency that he has. The way she organized the DA is something I would expect Tonks to do, not Harry. Granger's Army is lekker.

Having Kevin around has certainly mellowed her, which is good. Though I still assume there was - before this event - plenty of muttering amongst DA members about what a slavedriver she was in training for multiple scenarios.

Christina C. Keimig posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 1:46pm

I agree with you about the flying dementors. Book three never had them leave the ground. nor did book five.

Humiliating defeat for Voldie, eh?

atlantis-rob posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 1:26pm

Awesome chapter Crys! Nice work with the entire r4un of the battle and how it was handled. Harry's reaction to ginny's patronus was amusing. Excellent job on dumbles followup letter. Cheers!!!@

Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 1:18pm

*chuckle* Definitely one smart animal, that Crookshanks. ;)

An interesting battle that's going to cost Voldie a lot and gain a good bit for the light. I wonder if it was random effort or if it was an attempt to get Harry? The first seems more probable, but...

Anyway, great chapter there that should set up further ones a lot. If nothing else, I imagine that seeing the castle's defence in such good hands will take care of any concerns Harry may have had about leaving Hogwarts less well defended than it could be.

morriganscrow posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 1:05pm

You're right - in canon, Dementors float along at ground level or in an upright stance, mimicing walking.
Great chappie, nicely written (and beta'd!). I look forward to the ones to follow.

pyrodaemon posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 11:08am

Oh! It was wonderful. I really like how Crookshanks finally catch his rat, he must be really proud of himself ;) will you tell us what the x-mas gift is when it comes up? I think that was really cute.

Poor Ministry Abbott, he's so overworked lol. Is he really going to put the dementors back in Azkaban? That's pretty stupid if you ask me and wasn't Dumbledore against that from the beginning? I don't imagine he'd just mildly go along with it.

I like how you made the D.A. into a fighting force instead of fluffy nothingness like so many authors do.

And I think that's about it.

Have a great day.

Skoell posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 10:04am

great chapter!
nice skirmish scene!

typical that snape would claim the glory fpr teaching the students about the patronus charm...i hope that comes back to bite him in the ass!

dumbles' letter seemed a bit off, but it's an interesting idea. let's see what comes from it...

if they can give hermione a award -which is a nice idea- can they also take away riddle's award from 50 years ago?

didn't harry have to fly higher in PoA while trying to get away from the dementors? because they followed him and attacked him in the air??

Crys replied:

Snape will be dealt with.   Eventually.

David posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 10:04am

Well done :)

As to Dementors, I remember no canonical evidence that they fly... nor, in fact, that they cause actual frost (as opposed to 'feeling cold'). They are said, however, to 'glide', which I interpret as a 'hover up to about 6 inches above the ground' situation. If you've seen the relevant Buffy The Vampire Slayer episode, think of 'The Gentlemen', only with heavy hooded cloaks and no eyes - that's my approximate image.

jilumasam posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 8:46am

Nicely done. Seems to be more of a rout than an attack. I like the fact that the DA seems to have coped well without Harry there and have come up with good strategies... Harry may be a focal point of the war aginst mouldyvoldy, but at least he now has (and is still gathering) a large amount of support!

Thanks for a great story.

noylj posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 8:18am

They do "float" rather than walk.
Darn it, I have to thank you for the chapter, but I have to complain anyway that it was too short.

noylj posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 7:53am

Cold? In northern Scotland? In March? Sounds pretty normal to me.
Damn dementoids, damc dets. Can't fate allow Harry to simply enjoy a game without messing it up?

Crys replied:

No.

Or was that supposed to be a rhetorical question? :)

Prince Charon posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 7:20am

Interesting. I hope someone points out to the public how little Snape had to do with the students' abilities in Defense.

Thank you for the update.

More soon, please.

Crys replied:

Oh, that point will come up.   Eventually.

tula posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 6:56am

well the fact that the dementors harrassed harry during the quidditch game in the air kinda lends itself to the fact that they can fly.

Doesn't really matter though, you could simply say it looks as if they fly since their legs are covered by their cloaks.

Kail Ceannai posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 6:42am

I love Ginny's patronus - very creative!

Excellet writing.

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 6:34am

I remember a bit of an uproar when the movie came out when the dementors flew. It gave them a three-demensional advantage they do not seem to possess in canon. I've never seen any story where they were captured, not even a few of them, but this is perfectly logical, well conceived and executed on your part.

I like the fact that Harry did not have to save the day. Hermione would probably be a better long term teacher and strategist on how the DA should be trained and prepared. Ron would be a valuable assistant, but I can easily see canon Hermione doing as you had her do here.

Alas, my single biggest problem with HBP was the dissolution of the DA for all intents and purposes. So I can't imagine we will ever see what you so brilliantly protrayed here, or any form of it.

Great work, Crys!

Crys replied:

In the movie, the Patronus Charm produced a sphere around the caster, too.   Change in dementors, change in Charm, we're all still even.  

As an aside, why the director put Prongs into the movie (without any explanation whatsoever) is beyond me.

Musings of Apathy posted a comment on Friday 26th January 2007 6:32am

Great battle scene. I like hat you did not have Harry as the central, all powerful, figure that everyone relies on. To have his D.A. evolve and advance without him truly honors him. I would be surprised if no bumps in the road develop because of this battle. Surely everything is not going to be roses, someone will have trouble or make trouble because of this; cries of outrage that their child was made to fight, recriminations of Harry for NOT being a more pivotal fighter when all of these children wre fighting, something.

Harry's choice to not be mentioned centrally could make people ask why he was there and didn't do more, however wrong they are. A public outcry, led by his opponants in power in the Wizengamott, could call for a hearing as to why a founder heir did not do more or the teachers, for that matter.

Thanks for writing.

Mike (MoA)

Crys replied:

Harry's presence at the fight wasn't in the Prophet article, so it won't be generally known that he was there.   It might come up later (unfriendly parent of a student, for instance) later, though.