By Crys
Reviews
dougal74 posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 7:36pm
Another good chapter, but would like to see more of Hermione taking a greater role.
You mentioned line wars earlier in the chapter, why didn't Harry declare one between him and Snape???
gunners posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 7:04pm
A good chapter.Snape deserves the punishment given to him though,but I wonder what he will do to get back to Harry.
As for Dumbledore,I think he's scheming something for Harry
Wolfric posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 6:15pm
I think spiking his testicles to the desk would have been most appropriate. Afterall who knows how many people have been memory charmed and what has been hidden. I think he should have been fed a pint of veritaserum and questioned closely. Great chapter. Thanks for writing. W.
whatareyouevensaying posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 6:15pm
Arrg...I assume that Snape is already plotting his next nefarious move? He really does need to die. In some stories I can settle for a heaping load of unhappy, but in this one, he needs to die.
Whew, this chapter got me really worked up...I only state "facts" like that when I'm really pissed at a character. Nice work, getting me so deeply immersed!
Looking forward to more.
Crys replied:
I take it as a great compliment than I could get you worked up tot he point of frothing anger at one of my characters.
Glad you're enjoying it, and thank you for the review.
ProfessorBinns posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 6:08pm
This is great stuff, very inventive, but true enough to cannon characterization to keep my interest. Of course, given my biases, I'm hoping that Harry can manage to end up with Ginny (too?) by the end of the story, despite your handy dismissal of that possibility... I look forward to reading more, regardless. Thanks!
serenity16 posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 5:04pm
Wow this story is coming along great I hope theres more soon.
Jamie46 posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 4:35pm
*happy sighhhh* Man, I love this story. :)
Ok, I'm sure all the reviews talk about how much they were disgusted but not surprised by Snape, how they're thrilled about him being sacked etc, how they noticed that no one's seen him and are expecting foul play soon ... and so forth. So I won't repeat them.
:) But man that was a great chapter. Thanks for updating!
TheHard posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 4:19pm
Weird feeling I got after reading this chapter...
You know, when Hermione came weeping in the first part, I imagined that, after all, she has to know a lot of Harry situacion, and being her "investigative" self, she'll say, bossly, something like "You'll have to marry me too, Harry, because youre the only that I can see that is not all in the 'traditions' trash!" xD... but, after she get out angrily, I realied that she don't really takes the wole situation in this story...
Argh, that was kind of hard to write, sorry about my poor english, I hope that I made my point xD
Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 3:41pm
*wicked chuckle* It seems Severus managed to toally over-reach himself; I rather suspect Tommy-boy is going to have words with him on that, including Crucio!! This does better illuminate alot of the pureblood culture and I reckon that Harry's going to be learning a lot more courtesy of Neville and the two witches who are now his responsibility. In the long run, I rather suspect that his treating them like this is going to help bring all three of them together in a much stronger and intimate relationship but it's not going to happen immediately by any means.
brianjt posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 2:42pm
This story has been entertaining and does an excellent job of showing how alien wizarding culture can be.
It will be interesting to see how the marriage turns out. Will Harry accept it, try to change the rules or something else entirely.
Brian JT
Kinsfire posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 2:35pm
I love the fact that no one has called the purebloods in the school such as Neville and Ginny on their bit to play in all this.
Harry must conform to all of their conditions. On the other hand, they shrug when he points out that it's wrong. "It's the way it. You'll insult the Weasleys."
Pardon my Anglo-Saxon verbiage, but FUCK the Purebloods. Live with it while he can, and then get the hell out of Dodge. Start teaching Daphne and Tracey how to live in the Muggle world, and then leave as soon as possible. The Muggles, after all, don't have the chattel laws anymore, and he can let Tracey be who she wants to be.
But he needs to get away from the purebloods like Neville and the Weasleys who seem to think that perpetuating it helps somehow. (By forcing Harry to folow their customs, they perpetuate it. Ginny COULD have chosen a MUCH less public venue to apologize to Harry, and likely would have accepted the "Don't worry about it." She chose a place that reiterated her status as a pureblood.)
MonCappy posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 2:15pm
Snape better die for his actions. The story will not be considered good until he is dead.
Crys replied:
Would castration by rusty spoon followed by dropping his bleeding form into Knockturn Alley be sufficient, or is actual death a requirement?
Stygius posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 1:26pm
i wouldn't mind harry having drawn up the paperwork to transfer school in the background for him and the girls, with possibly hermione and neville tagging along... i doubt he will need it, but having them should help in some matters...
btw, will the paper get the news about Snape being fired for attempted rape (on a student, as the Potter girls were not mentioned and only rumored). what effect will this have on dumbles (who continues to guarantee the snape's life and work).
what will the order (especially moody) think of this... will tracey's parents be sending a letter or request a meeting with their daughters lord???
looking forward to see more of tracey and daphne and how they bounce back from this, will there Defence and Offence spell casting be a little more vindictive now towards men in general... hermione's reaction was underplayed i think... he accepted it a little too easily... will she be planning something in the background, or will she also wish to be involved with the defense trainign with tonks?
will harry be inacting some revenge, will his drive and aggression improve now when sending out those offense magic against Fil and especially DEs...
what (if anything) will the staff of hogwarts due in regards to snape and dumbles... will they finally pull their fingers out and start second guessing dumbles...
where are you taking Ron with this story? we all saw this coming. Has he gotten the message?
looking forward to luna's interview...
congrats.
SassyFrass posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 1:19pm
Great update! I loved the idea of using the Sorting Hat to tell if someone is lying or not.
I hope Ron gets soundly slapped upside the head!
Looking forward to more!
pcpatty posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 1:04pm
I am liking this very much...I am not usually happy with any kind of anti-Snape sentiments but for some reason this works. I am looking forward to see where this goes =)
Scriptare posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 1:04pm
I'm generally really lax when it comes to fan fiction, as I typically read for the sake of wasting time and amusement. If I wanted a masterpiece, I'll return to a published book from a reader's circle or something.
That said, this story has been a damn coaster when it comes to being somewhat entertaining to frustrating as hell.
Yeah, it's relatively amusing to read at times, but 80 percent of the time, it was a chore to read, like running through mud with work boots. The assumptions one has to make are some of the ones that unfortunately land on my shit list.
The biggest for me was the patriarchal angle when it comes to magical society. And not only that, but also taking it as far as slavery contracts that are - surprise, surprise! - unbreakable by all reasonable means. A veritable tsunami of fics nowadays use this mechanic, and it's getting predictable, not to mention, as boring as watching drying paint.
Sure, you polished it up nice and bright, but it's still the same thing in the end, just dressed up a tad different.
Then, there's the angst overload. There are happy moments, with fluff added in almost like an afterthought, but in the end, it is heavily angst sided. And it doesn't make this fic dark or gloomy; it makes it nigh unreadable at times because you can't help but wonder if every character is a closet emo.
Futhermore, characterization, in a nutshell is totally off. Yes, Ron is an idiot at times, but that goes for all of us. It's not the bashing that bothers me so much as the unexplained reason for his behaviour behind his actions toward Harry's 'chattel'. He is a pureblood, and as such, it is only reasonable to assume that he understands the status of said chattel, but his actions toward them seriously do not suggest anything that can be canon assumed to that point. Namely, his close friendship with Harry and the reasonable level of tact that normally comes with that. Yes, sometimes, he's obtuse and as oblivious as a wall, but he isn't that stupid.
Your characterization of Daphne and Tracy is nothing special, but it is one of the few bright spots in this story - that being relative to fan fiction in general however.
Neville as the all knowing pureblood is just annoying. His insistence that Harry MUST follow the spoken and unspoken rules and regulations of magical society - which has been summed up as 'that's just the way it's been' - is absolutely aggravating! For the sake of Harry's image? Pretty weak. No where in canon does it suggest that Harry subconsciously cares for society.
Every time some minor magical etiquette props up, via Neville (of course), I want to break something.
Maybe it's too much to ask but, will Harry ever grow a backbone? Oh! Look at the way he dealt with Snape and his attempted rape. Clearly taking charge!
Jesus. H. Christ.
Crys replied:
I'm sorry that you're disliking the story. Thank you, though, for stopping on your way out to explain the why.
impatientuser posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 12:32pm
Great chapter... I hope Snape dies soon =).
vheritas posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 12:14pm
An excellent chapter. Mind you, I too wish Tracey had spiked Snape's shrivelled, sweaty little nutsack to the desk.
brad posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 12:12pm
Hmmm, Luna never turned up to do her interview, even though this chapter covered quite a bit of time (weeks, I'd say). Rats. There goes my theory/hope of (poor, lonely) Luna joining the HP unit/marriage. :-( We HP fans are never satisfied, are we? Two wives are not enough!! :-) But I did feel sorry for Luna, I did (wishfully) see some little hint that she might have fancied Harry, or at least hoped somewhere that the boy who understood her so well might have maybe been something more.
Nice scene of Snape's trial. I fully expected things to accelerate and Harry challenge him to a duel, so I was *very* pleased to read of his working out that Snape was "deliberately trying to aggravate the situation" and keeping his cool. He's matured. And that's great to see.
Mind you, I don't expect things to stop there; I still expect my duel to happen. Maybe Snape, in his exile, will snap and try and ambush our hero in a deserted corridor or something. Let's see.
Okay, I'm miffed at Daphne, and Tracey, too. They *know* that Hermione is muggle raised ... and even if they didn't know what that meant before, they've now got all of their experience with Harry to help them understand what that means. Everyone's expecting Harry and Hermione to make all the changes, to bend over backwards in accommodating wizarding customs - and maybe that's reasonable, since they've chosen to live in the magical world - but there, in Harry's quarters, they should damn well show some flexibility themselves. Daphne *knew* that Hermione would jump to conclusions, but no, no accommodating her husband's best friend, who loves him so much (albeit platonically). Yes, Daphne wasn't overly lascivious in her behaviour, but she saw that Hermione was there, could have said nothing, or even explained (like Tracey) ... but instead she just "shrugged". Yep, everyone has to change their mental frames of reference to accommodate the purebloods. Arrgh. And Tracey didn't have to be so condescending/condemning either. Hermione had just lost her boyfriend, she was in a bad mood, and then Daphne came out doing her thing.
*IS ANGRY ON HERMIONE'S BEHALF*
Thank you for the chapter, thoroughly enjoyable. (My being angry at Harry's concubines doesn't mean that I thought this was a bad chapter, of course!)
Crys replied:
Glad you could be happy with me yet angry at a few of my characters.
Sorry I couldn't include Luna, but this isn't going to turn into a harem fic. Well, anymore than it already is. Much more, anyway.
Snape will show up later. Don't know how satisfying his final fate will be, but I'm happy with it.
Thanks for reviewing and glad you're enjoying it.
noylj posted a comment on Friday 28th August 2009 8:09pm
Crys replied: