Sterling posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 5:38pm

Your a good writer and I enjoy your stories. However, I think you are pushing your marriage contract premise to far by involving two girls.

It makes the plot seem less like an interesting take on wizarding culture and more of an adolescent fantasy. Still, given the general high quality of your writing I am sure I will find this story entertaining. Thanks.

Crys replied:

It's not going to devolve into a multi, smut fic.   There are entirely too many of those already.

I'm trying to look at this from the girls' PoV some and a bit of what kind of society could produce this situation in the first place.

Thank you for having the patience to stick with it, even though it started like it could be a juvenile fantasy story.

kb0 posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 5:35pm

That's an interesting start. It is a start and there will be more, right? IF not, that's a horrible way to end it. :)

Crys replied:

Yes, there will be more.   Even *I* am not that evil :)

heathw posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 5:16pm

A fun start. It's great to see you writing again!

Chris1 posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 5:12pm

Reading this, I was half-dreading the appearance of the overused Mo!Ron. :D Glad to see you kept away from it.

Looking forward to the next chapter :) Are you planning on weekely updates? Or more often ones (pleasesayyes!!) ?

Chris

Crys replied:

Weekly or bi-weekly, yes.

Glad you're enjoying it.

impatientuser posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 5:07pm

Must have more. I know I must have read some own your spouse kind of stories in the past, but this seems new and extremely good.

Nice dig at HP/GW catastrophe =)

Crys replied:

More chapters coming.

As for the HP/GW from JKR . . .   I just couldn't resist Harry's line.

thumper posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 4:36pm

Wow Im happy to see this fleshed out into a story

spornoc posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 4:17pm

Hoping you write a sequel to deal with the various hanging threads.

Crys replied:

This is just the first chapter of many.

Stygius posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 3:55pm

more?

it seemed a little rushed and dis-connected at a few points, which didn't seem completely natural. but then with you scenerio i believe normal has nothing to do with it.

overall a nice foundation of something more.

Crys replied:

Definitely more chapters to come.

Glad you're enjoying it.

Orion posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 3:38pm

This was a fun read. Thanks for writing.

PopeYodaI posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 3:09pm

Mmmm.. vastly improved over Rorschach's excellent idea. A bit disappointed you chose to keep the Retard!Dumbledore thing going, but if it's necessary for your plot, by all means keep it. Although keep in mind that he is (I think) a pure-blood himself.

Well, I look forward to your next chapter. Probably going to be the feedback he gets from his actions (Rita writing more disparaging articles, offers of money from idiots in exchange for time with the two ladies leading to much Violent!Harry, etc...)

Crys replied:

AD's a naive idiot at this point, but he will get better.

As for your guesses . . . *innocent whistling*

blue artemis posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 2:56pm

Quite interesting.

Jonathan Langford posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 2:23pm

I'm assuming there's more to it than this...

A very good start.

Crys replied:

Yep, more chapters coming.

Glad you're enjoying it.

dogbertcarroll posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 1:50pm

I always did want to see this expanded. Nice work.

stormwing921 posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 1:12pm

nice start can't wait to see how it unfolds

ching965 posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 12:58pm

Very well written. This is an interesting way to look at the situation. There are a number of betrothal stories out there. The idea of chattel, though, isn't very often seen. You've definitely done it justice. Fabulously written. Thank you for a great read. I hope for more soon.

FireStorm posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 12:52pm

Excellent job. I am looking forward to you continuing this.

Deborahsu posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 12:35pm

A good start--I look forward to seeing what happens next!!

SassyFrass posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 12:31pm

Very interesting. I would love to read more of this.

Crys replied:

There will be more.

Glad you're enjoying it.

Ezra'eil posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 12:23pm

Poor Harry, he's 'gonna get roasted'....

dennisud posted a comment on Friday 3rd July 2009 12:13pm

Like the start of this!
But if I know Malfoy Sr. he's already cooking up a way to get back at Harry either through the two girls, or one of his close friends. He IS an arranger of marriages, right. Why not Force Hermione to marry a Malfoy ally or something! Make even more bad blood with the Wizarding society if what Neville says is true!

See you got me already!
BTW a H/Hr & H/L fan but easily adding H/D/T to that!

dennisud