Lord Baphomet posted a comment on Friday 10th July 2009 8:03pm for The Duel

Hey,

I really enjoyed it, though I would like to leave some criticism too.

I think that Harry was surprised that he couldn't just release the girls was a little unrealistic. I just felt that the girls made it very clear that they were exchanging one master for the other, and that they would of just asked if Harry would release them would that be possible.

Also, Ron's behavior just seems odd. I know that he's always the one with his foot in the mouth and lacking tact, but not quite that badly!

Anyways, looking forward to more and I hope it comes soon.

Crys replied:

I understand what you're saying about Harry's surprise, but look at it from his point of view for a moment.   This entire sequence (from his point of view) has taken something like a half an hour.   Not exactly a lot of time to think things through.

Yes, Ron is acting more of a boor than usual, but that will be explained (pureblood view of chattel).

Thanks for the review.   The next chapter was just posted.

liquidfyre posted a comment on Friday 10th July 2009 4:44pm for The Duel

Interesting idea and looking forward to more

Bob Swagger posted a comment on Friday 10th July 2009 6:27am for The Duel

Great first chapter. Looking forward to the rest.

willyjoeshow posted a comment on Friday 10th July 2009 4:03am for The Duel

Great chapter. Hope to read more soon

~Willyjoeshow

jessie179 posted a comment on Thursday 9th July 2009 11:43pm for The Duel

MORE! Is there more?

Crys replied:

There will be more.

Glad you're enjoying it.

Mihir posted a comment on Thursday 9th July 2009 12:02pm for The Duel

Pretty good ... I especially found that reference you made regarding Harry and Ginny in The Half Blood Prince humorous
Can't wait to see where this goes ... Do update soon!

athenewolfe posted a comment on Thursday 9th July 2009 10:37am for The Duel

lovely story so far!

Alex Austin posted a comment on Thursday 9th July 2009 9:53am for The Duel

Is this done yet, or will I have to continue to watch it? Very interesting premise.

Crys replied:

I encourage you to continue reading.   Many more chapters to come.

DAMNED posted a comment on Thursday 9th July 2009 4:47am for The Duel

keep it coming its good. is it going to be a long story.

Ron posted a comment on Wednesday 8th July 2009 8:42pm for The Duel

I hope you'll do more with this

Crys replied:

That was the first chapter.   Many more to come.

Bree Peeler posted a comment on Wednesday 8th July 2009 7:25am for The Duel

Just to be clear, this is a one-shot? That sucks, I see potential here.

Crys replied:

nope, this isn't a one-shot.   Just the first chapter.

Glad you're enjoying it.

Full_Pensieve posted a comment on Tuesday 7th July 2009 3:54am for The Duel

Hi, Crys. Someone mentioned that you'd posted a new one, so I quickly popped over to check it out. A nice adaptation of Blot's one-off. By taking his semi-parody and playing it straight, you've ended up with a Harry that's reasonably in character. I like Neville having the backbone to challenge Harry's decision making.

Now, this is the point where a lot of fanfic writers proceed to enter Harry into a harem that pulls in:
(a) Hermione (on the assumption that because she was the brains behind the whole thing, she's actually a closeted bisexual with a thing for Ms. Greengrass);
(b) Ginny (almost obligatory since the DH canon was settled, but still frequently presented as a fangirl with childhood expectations);
(c) Susan Bones (because Jbern, Old Crow et al have succeeded in making the Harry/Susan ship believable and appealing, and in so doing have shaped an accepted Susan fanon... and because poor Susie is doomed in nearly all ship-worthy fanfics to have big, attention-getting breasts);
(d) Luna (since her oddness is a mask for hedonism waiting to be unshackled in the bluntest possible fashion); and
(e) the Player-to-be-named-later (take your pick; nearly everyone else is effectively an OC).

;-D

Is this a one-off, or the first chapter of something? It reads like a first chapter, espec. the way it cuts off. If that's the case, I hope you avoid the pitfall described above. I don't get that impression thus far.

As usual from your work, an enjoyable read.

Cheers,
Mike [FP}

Crys replied:

While I'm not about to give away the plot, I will assure you that this is not going to degenerate into an adolescent male fantasy fic where hung!Harry has every witch under the sun swearing undying servitude toward him, not to mention each bringing their own sexual kink.

Not that there aren't about 25 billion fics out there like that or anything.

This'll be a multi-chapter fic.   This is just the beginning.

Good to hear from you, Mike.   Cheers.

Patrick Rice posted a comment on Tuesday 7th July 2009 3:35am for The Duel

Very Good Start! I like your continuation of RB's idea, and am hoping for more. Please keep up the good work.

Patrick

sabitha posted a comment on Tuesday 7th July 2009 12:32am for The Duel

i'm hoping this isn't going to be a oneshot. This has a lot of potential. I am excited to keep reading! Update soon! Please?

Crys replied:

Definitely going to be a multi-chapter fic.

Glad you're enjoying it.

William Martin posted a comment on Monday 6th July 2009 8:23pm for The Duel

Quite interesting so far. An accidental, arranged marraige... wow! I thought Tracey was a first or second year. Maybe that's from another story. It would be even weirder if Harry was forced to marry an 11 or 12 year old.
At least they are away from Malfoy!

Poirot posted a comment on Monday 6th July 2009 5:13am for The Duel

Great chapter! I love the concept, and the writing is well done.

defiant1981 posted a comment on Monday 6th July 2009 4:33am for The Duel

Like the way the story is been set up. Iam very curious to see if there will be weasley bashing? Always hoping or more dumbledore bashing.

Hagrid posted a comment on Monday 6th July 2009 4:17am for The Duel

I got som'att ter ask yeh, Just how much sleep der yeh think our 'Arry's gonna get ternight? Pool lad will be tossin' and turnin' faster than a niffler in a sack of galleons. Tis enough ter even keep me awake, wonderin' how he's got 'imself inter this one. An them pure-bloods call me a savage? A great job on yer part, no questions there.

Crys replied:

Thanks, Hagrid.

Poor Harry will be having a few sleep-deprived nights, but he'll survive it.

Oh, and Hagrid?   Tether a thestral for Harry and his girls, would you?   They'll need to borrow a coach after the wedding.   Thanks.

Jamie46 posted a comment on Monday 6th July 2009 3:38am for The Duel

Niiiiiice. Really, I liked it a lot. I went back to read the original bunny before starting yours, and I saw some of the initial changes. I like how you expanded on it, etc... and also how you made it so you could go into multiple chapters. :) Great stuff. Thanks for sharing!

Ken Warner posted a comment on Sunday 5th July 2009 11:46pm for The Duel

quite enjoyable, I am looking forward to the eruption of Mount Hermione that once and for all clears the rubble of filthy-minded Ron ness away from Harry and his trio or quad of excellent wives/consorts. After that ball and chain has been removed from his metaphorical feet he should be able to fairly quickly eliminate the 2 dark lards and move to a relatively free society.

thanks for sharing