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Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Tuesday 5th February 2008 12:47pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

The knight waited, waiting for time to end his life. After that nasty business with the Nazis, the item that had given him near-immortality had been lost. Good riddance. He probably had only a few years left, anyway.

To his surprise, he heard voices approaching. Someone else had made their way past the three trials? Most curious. He straightened himself up, making sure to be a proper Knight of Arthur's Round Table when the new visitor arrived.

The visitor in question was a young man in dark robes. A look of greed was in his eye, and the knight decided to let him meet his fate. No need to mention that the cup of a carpenter was lost down a crevasse. "Choose, from these many cups, the true Holy Grail...but choose wisely."

(Optional: Continue scene, include Riddle drinking from a wrong cup, and disintegrating into a skeleton. "He chose...poorly.")

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 31st

Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Tuesday 5th February 2008 12:42pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

"All right, Adam, today the Mythbusters will be tackling a myth sent in by, of all people, a British viewer."
"Right you are, Jamie. We'll be tackling the myth that a Dark Wizard can make himself immortal by splitting his soul and embedding the pieces in various items."
"Our team has located those items, and will be testing a secondary myth - that these 'Horcruxes' are indestructible. How are things going over there?"
***
"Well, to be properly scientific about all this, we've made sure to use plenty of C4, and-"
"Woohoo! We never get to use THAT many explosives at once!"
"We've inspected the site and...yes, nothing's left of them. This myth has been busted!"
***
"Well, that was quick. All that's left for today is to test the immortality myth - is the Dark Wizard still immortal after the destruction of those items?"
"Well, we're going to have to be just as scientific about this..."

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 30th

Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Tuesday 5th February 2008 8:56am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

As his Death Eaters completed the ritual, Voldemort cackled. Searching the ruins of a fallen civilization, he had discovered that those ancient people had bound a Demon Prince to their will. The contract was never-ending, and as he was now the sole holder of the knowledge, he could invoke the demon and wreak havoc upon the world!

The ritual completed, and a towering figure emerged from the summoning circle. Seeing its new masters, it bent to one knee. "What is thy bidding, master?"

***

Slowly bleeding to death, Voldemort wondered what had gone wrong. He sought to destroy his enemies, to rule the world. Now? His headquarters were in flames, his Horcruxes had met with tragic accidents, his minions were all dead, and his nemesis - the Potter brat - was impassively watching him die.

"Why?...I had a Demon Prince on my side...how could I lose?..."
"Honestly, Tom. You should have thought this out - those ancient people had the demon on their side, and they were destroyed too. That's what happens when you try to get the Demon Prince of Incompetence to do your dirty work for you."

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 29th

Killer07 posted a comment on Monday 4th February 2008 7:30pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

As fate came from her lunch break she sees her tapestry unraveling. As she looks for the reason she find the thread of one Tom Marvollo Riddle trying to change the past to fit his schemes. Because of this Fate decides to cut this thread. Couldn't do that this young upstart ruins her planned hollidays in a few years. It would be the first since millenniums an she really needed a break.

Greetings

Killer07 (The reason wizards disappear while trying to change the time with a time turner)

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 87th

Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Monday 4th February 2008 7:33am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Voldemort exulted in his newfound power. An artifact he'd unearthed had unlocked the true potential of an oft-maligned branch of magic - Arithmancy. With this, however, he could use equations and rewrite reality itself!

In a flash, he relocated himself to Hogwarts. He brought his newfound power to bear, smashing against the wards. They held - barely. Smirking, Voldemort quickly drew up a new equation to make real, to fill himself with more power!

And then he imploded. Examining the remains, it was determined that he'd attempted to divide by zero.

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 28th

Killer07 posted a comment on Sunday 3rd February 2008 1:04am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Of the many Ghosts that were locked away in the containment unit of the Ghostbusters some where once muggles that were tortured and killed by Voldy. As the city decided to force the shutdown of the power supply to the containment unit and caused the mass breakout those ghosts decided to finally pay Voldy a visit. Unfortunately for Voldy most muggle ghosts are far more dangerous than wizard ghosts.

Greetings

Killer07 (Mass visit of your muggle victims Voldy have fun :-) )

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 86th

Killer07 posted a comment on Friday 1st February 2008 11:16pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

As Q had an argument with Lady Q and impersonates Mr Evans to get some relief with Mrs Evans. This resulted in Lilly Evans wo unfortunately never developed Q powers. But Harry developed those "Powers Voldy knows not" After removing Voldy he strips all of Moldyshorts supporters of their magic and goes with Hermione on a trip through the Multiverse to learn new things (I don't think Hermione could resist this)

Greetings

Killer07 (Q is one of my favorites :-) )

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 85th

Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Tuesday 29th January 2008 8:23am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Inspired by a gadget in Paranoia:

Voldemort simply glared at the wizard-inventor before him. He'd had his minions 'recruit' the man because of his reputation for building brilliant - or insane - magical items.

What Voldemort hadn't anticipated was how bloody USELESS the items produced would be!

"Explain again. Slowly. With reasons that I shouldn't kill you right here and now."

"As I was explaining, milord, these Fire-and-forgetpicks would help your dark armies handle dental hygiene more quickly! You simply pull one toothpick from the box, toss it out, and it instantly finds the nearest teeth and cleans them!"

Volemort was silent for a full minute before bellowing, "THE DARK LORD VOLDEMORT CARES NOT FOR TOOTHCLEANERS!", throwing the box to the ground in a fit of fury. The box burst, releasing two hundred automagic toothpicks.

Shortly thereafter, the bloody mist that had been Voldemort had a newfound appreciation for the term 'swarming'.

(A/N: And the sad thing is, they didn't go berserk or anything - they just all tried to work at once...)

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 27th

Killer07 posted a comment on Saturday 26th January 2008 9:05am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

As the war went on the muggles became aware of the magic world and united forces against Moldyshorts. Everythink went fine for Voldy until he decided to attack a gathering of muggle and magic leaders to coordinate a defense against him. One of the guests is John McClane. One of the biggest mistakes of the DE's was torturing one Lucy McClane for fun and planing to have fun with her later. The last thing Voldy ever hears was the line "Yippee ki yay, motherfucker"

Greetings

Killer07 (Just bought and watched Die Hard 4 :-) )

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 84th

Eric Oppen posted a comment on Friday 4th January 2008 5:31pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

What if Voldemort found himself up against one of the few things that terrified and defeated both Bugs Bunny and Adolf Hitler...gremlins?

The Dark Lord was worried. What was going wrong with everything today? He had a new plan, a cunning and subtle one, that was sure to take out that pestilential Harry Potter...

And then he heard the singing, and his blood froze.

"We are gremlins from the Kremlin, we are gremlins from the Kremlin! We're here, we're there, we're everywhere, we're in the Dark Lord's hair!"

Tom Riddle had seen enough Muggle cartoons to know what [italic}that meant. He somehow managed to go even paler than he had been before.

ihatefanet posted a comment on Monday 31st December 2007 2:39pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

How about a blood-type mismatch between the embryonic Voldemort (pre-GoF ceremony) and Harry?

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.  

Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Wednesday 26th December 2007 6:15am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

It was a shame there were Muggle-repelling wards up. This battle really deserved to be videotaped.

The Dark Lord Voldemort was facing what forces of light remained to battle him. He'd been forced, due to a potent spell from that Potter brat, to unleash his true power - channeling the immortality magics from his Horcruxes into pure might. As the heroes rallied themselves to face this new force of darkness, the enraged Voldemort twisted his face into a visage of fury...

...and then shock, as an arm was now protruding from his chest. As he slumped to the ground, his vision darkening, he heard his killer's voice.

"Nice try, kid, but I believe it'll be the Dark Lord Grindewald taking over, not some brat afraid to use his real name."

- Gullwhacker (Inspired by Slayers Next)

Killer07 posted a comment on Sunday 23rd December 2007 11:15am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Death was not a happy entity as he checked his computer. Because he has so much to do he lets his computer handle most death's and now the system send him the logs of one Tom Marvollo Riddle

Result: Death by backfired avada kedavra failed...
Action: schedule alternative death
Result: Death by Harry Potters touch failed...
Action: schedule alternative
Result: Death by error in potion of Pettigrew failed
Result: Death by duel against Harry Potter failed
Action: Analyse cause and notify true death
Result: Alarm!!! Hocrux detected and life force + magic of one Harry Potter leeched of

He hated it if mortals try to cheat him and his list (To much work to reorganise the list if the deaths don't happen). And he really hated it if someone tries to life on the life of someone other without consent (He had no problems with the old grandfather getting a few extra hours through the people of his family to say goodbye) Now as he looked for Voldemort he found him possesing Harry on the DoM. It seemed that he had to show himself to the mortals. After all this would be the simples way to collect Riddle and return Sirius Black who wasn't scheduled to die for a long time. Oh death really wasn't happy today and he would make Tom Riddle aware of this...

Greetings

Killer07 (I really ask myself where that came from...)

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 83rd

Killer07 posted a comment on Sunday 23rd December 2007 6:52am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Harry wishes for a easy way to dispose of Voldy to Christmas. Because of this Santa gives him a terapedo as present. A smart missile with an AI that likes to do nothing more than to explode and the ability to teleport itself (From Schlock Mercenary http://www.schlockmercenary.com/d/20020307.html is one strip with such a terapedo in action) And the second think he gets is a reciever to get the image of Voldy as the terapedo arives in his lair *G*.

Greetings

Killer07 (Imagine the look on Voldy and co as the terapedo introduces itself and goes boom)

Killer07 posted a comment on Sunday 16th December 2007 4:15am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Ginny's tries to get Harry with a love potion go wrong. The Potions magic properties always get transfered through the link to Voldy due to Harry's core fighting the controlling part of the potion. Now she always gets stalked by a Dark Lord and always gets black roses etc as presents. Totaly frustrated by this she sends a blasting hex against Tom.

Greetings

Killer07 (HHr forever)

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 82nd

Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Monday 3rd December 2007 4:22am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Tom Riddle sat down at a desk in the library, taking out his Advanced Arithmancy course. Sure, it was a difficult subject, and most of the students had already given up, but he was better. Half-blood or no, orphan or no, he'd show them - he'd tackle the worst the professor could throw at him, without any help whatsoever! His resolve set, Tom set out to finish the assignment.

Two hours later, the professor took a second look at the assignment he'd handed out. "Oh dear, I seem to have reversed those runes...I think this is unsolvable now. Ah, well, I'm sure the students will ask for help." Leaning back in his chair, he didn't even see a frazzled Tom Riddle throwing himself from the Astronomy Tower in frustration.

- Gullwhacker (who has been at this math assignment too long!)

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file.   Your 26th

Killer07 posted a comment on Saturday 1st December 2007 11:58pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

Voldemort and his followers are searching an old dark artifact that is rumored to boost the powers of a dark lord. Unfortunately for him the best muggle archelogist of her time is also searching for the artifact. He soon finds out that Lara Croft is no easy opponent and that she is very good in different fighting styles and has a very good aim with her guns.

Greetings

Killer07 (currently watching his Tomb Raider 2 DVD)

Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 5:49pm for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

*chuckle* I love the newest "deaths", #276 strikes me as a particularly cruel one. *wicked chuckle* As an addition, have the Slytherin Girls choir sing "You Light Up My Life" to him that way (yes, there's a bad experience behind that suggestion). In #268, if there was anything left of him after their tests were complete, I can see the remains being shoved into a crate and stacked in the storehouse seen at the end of "Raiders of the Lost Ark". For #266, I'm nasty enough to have made it an inverted cross (somehow, certain uses of that symbol make it appropriate for Tom).

twistedmic posted a comment on Tuesday 20th November 2007 10:14am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

here's another bunny.

"Welcome to the 'Family', mister Riddle. I think this is the beginning of a very lucrative partnership." Antonio Salvatore said as he extended his hand towards his newest business associate.
"Thank you, mister Salvatore." Voldemort, posing as Thomas Marcus Riddle, replied as he shook the proffered hand. " I look forward to many years of profitable business."
Voldemort, in order to earn a great deal more money for his upcoming attempt at taking over Magical Britain to muggle New York city to enter the drug and sex trade.
"Let's have a drink to celebrate this occasion." Salvatore said as he crossed over to the bar.
Just as Salvatore reached the bar, the double doors to his office flew inward and three of Salvatore's bodyguards, covered in splatters of blood. "Boss! He's here! Coming up here right now!"
"Oh, fuck!" Salvatore moaned then dashed towards his desk and dove behind it.
Seconds later the doors swung open again and a tall, grizzled looking muggle stepped in.
The man nearest Voldemort whimpered in fear as he soiled himself.
'Why are they so afraid of this man?' Voldemort thought. 'Sure he's bigger than Dolohov and uglier than Mad-eye Moody, but what he's wearing is ridiculous. I mean, really, who would think a big white skull drawn on a black shirt was intimidating?"

Eric Oppen posted a comment on Tuesday 20th November 2007 6:24am for Two Hundred and Fifty-One to Three Hundred

What if the power the Dark Lord knows not is _Money?_

"Ah, ha!" screamed Voldemort. "I have you at last, Harry Potter! Get him, my loyal Death Eaters!"

Harry didn't look worried, merely holding up a hand. "Now, hold on, Death Eaters. What is this mook paying you, anyway?"

The Death Eaters looked nonplussed. "D'uh...pay us? We have to pay _him!_"

"Yeah, an' clean up after that snake of his!"

Harry nodded. "As I thought! How'd you like to come work for me instead? Five weeks a year paid holidays, medical and dental benefits, a retirement plan..." The Death Eaters ran forward and began kissing his hands and the hem of his robes. "I'll take that as a 'yes, we'd love to work for you.' See my secretary. Ginny, darling, draw up some more 'Crony of Harry Potter' contracts---and stick around after office hours, if you know what I mean, dear."

Voldemort erupted in rage. "Curse you, Harry Potter, you rich bastard! CURSE YOU! Every time we meet, this happens! I can't get any more Death Eaters in Britain!"

Harry laughed a superior laugh. "That's because I've hired them all myself! Give it over, _Dole-_de-mort! You'll never win!"

Voldemort jumped up and down in fury. "Oh, yeah? I'll---I'll import cheap foreign labor Death Eaters from the Commonwealth! I'll beat you yet, you rich swine!"

"Oh, no you won't," Harry replied. He gestured toward Lord Voldemort. "Get him, MY newly-loyal cronies!"

(The ensuing scene of Mindless Ultra-Violence and Voldemort-bashing has been CENSORED for YOUR PROTECTION by the Ministry of Magic. You are in error. No one is screaming. Thank you for your cooperation, and remember---the Ministry of Magic (Minimaj) is YOUR FRIEND.)

Crys replied:

Thanks.   Bunny added to the file