1001 Deaths of Lord Voldemort
Fifty-one to One Hundred
By Crys
Yes, I am still adding to this story as ideas occur to me or are sent in.
51. Another bunny from Killer07
"We will all Portkey to the Hogwarts front lawn, inside the wards. You all have your assignments. Anyone failing me will wish for a quick death. Is that understood?" Voldemort glared around.
All Death Eaters were nodding with varying levels of enthusiasm.
"Portkeys activate in five seconds. Prepare yourselves."
All the Portkeys activated at the same time. All of them were set to deposit their passengers standing upon terra firma.
That's why all of the Death Eaters immediately started drowning as they appeared at the bottom of Hogwarts Lake.
Voldemort, wanting to stand out from his followers, had set his Portkey to appear a short distance away from the rest of them. Instead of underwater, he appeared just in front of a tree trunk. It took until the first branch hit him in the side of the head, dazing him, before he realized it was the Whomping Willow.
52. Another bunny from Killer07
Voldemort lowered his wand. "Fool. A muggle attacking the greatest Dark Lord to ever live with a sword? Well, a dead fool now."
He turned his back and walked away. He only made it a short distance before his head was removed from his shoulders by a single cut.
The Immortal stood still, arms outstretched. After nearly a minute waiting for the Quickening, he shrugged in confusion. "Well, he must not have been Immortal after all. Must've felt the Buzz from something else."
53. Another bunny from Killer07
Battle-ready, the Death Eaters arrived by portkey.
Instead of in front of Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, they found themselves in a jungle.
Voldemort spun in place. "Goyle! What did you do wrong with the Portkeys?"
"My apologies, My Lord," the large and not very bright wizard simpered. "I will have them recast in a moment."
From one side, a voice spoke up. "My Lord? There is a ruined muggle building over here. InGen Corporation?"
From another side came a shriek. "Help! Huge lizard thing!"
From a third side, an overlapping voice shouted, "A dozen upright lizards! Ava -" The voice cut off in a gargle.
The final noise Voldemort heard was an unearthly roar as a tyrannosaurus stepped into view.
54. Another bunny (modified) from Killer07
Voldemort, riding in the back of Quirrell's head, snapped, "Touch nothing, fool, except the stone."
"Yes, My Lord." A moment more of spell work, and they appeared in vault 713.
A small pile of galleons was there, but nothing else. In desperation, Quirrell started sifting through the coins, hoping the stone was buried among them.
"Touch nothing, I say!" Voldemort shrieked just as they were removed from the vault by goblin magic.
Goblins work under the theory that thieves should be dealt with, with a minimum of fuss.
Therefore, Quirrell - and Voldemort - were transported three miles straight downward.
Unfortunately for them, there was no open space at their arrival point.
55. Bunny (modified) by David Thacker
Voldemort was beyond angry.
The running fight had been going throughout the hastily abandoned St. Mungo's Hospital for the past hour. Most of his Death Eaters had been wounded in one way or another and been revived to continue the fight.
How Potter and his ragtag group of allies, especially that thrice-damned family of redheads, could resist his forces this long was something that Voldemort couldn't comprehend.
The Dark Lord and a handful of followers finally cornered Potter and two of his redheaded friends in the potions preparation area.
"Any final words, Potter?" Voldemort snarled.
"Yes, actually," one of the twins said. He pointed to a Death Eater on Voldemort's right. "That purple glop he fell in? It's flammable." A short wand flick later, and the wide-eyed, panicked Death Eater went up in flames, catching several of his fellow Death Eaters in the sudden fireball.
Voldemort jumped away from him just as the second twin said, "That green powder all over this other Dead Muncher explodes." Another wand flick and the unfortunate Death Eater with green powder in his hair and all down his shirt was suddenly flying face-first the three feet toward his Master.
56. Another bunny from Killer07
Voldemort led Rookwood, Macnair, and Wormtail through the ancient ruins somewhere in a South American jungle. According to his research, a forgotten magical civilization had left behind numerous dark artifacts behind, and he was determined to get his hands on a few of them.
Stepping cautiously through a dark tunnel, Voldemort was amazed to find a muggle wearing all brown clothing - down to a floppy brown hat - come running toward them.
"Run!" the muggle yelled as he went barreling past the four wizards without slowing.
Blinking in confusion at the unexpected sight, Macnair looked back forward just in time to see a huge round rock come rolling down the tunnel at them.
57. Bunny by Tommy L aka fanfix
A sixteen year old Tom Marvolo Riddle stepped into the Chamber of Secrets for the first time.
Gazing around in wonder and fantasizing about all of the power that would shortly be at his fingertips, the young wizard did not hear the sound of a large snake as it came up behind him.
58. Another bunny by Tommy L aka fanfix
Instead of retreating to Albania after his incompetent follower Quirrell had perished, Voldemort started possessing the small animals of the Forbidden Forest.
He needed to be near Hogwarts. All of his plans required him to be here.
Just as Voldemort was about to possess his twenty-sixth snake, a crashing noise and bright light distracted him. Before he could do more than turn his attention that way, a large object came right through the area he'd been floating in, somehow swallowing the Dark Lord whole.
Arthur Weasley's Ford Anglia let out a large backfire.
59. Another bunny by Killer07
Standing with his back to the Forbidden Forest, Harry was flanked by the D.A. and the Order of the Phoenix.
Standing across from them were Lord Voldemort and his Death Eaters.
The numbers were not in the Light's favor.
By a lot.
Voldemort was smirking. "You know you cannot win."
Instead of answering the comment, Harry turned his head fractionally and said, "Headmaster, I must admit that I lied to you years ago."
"About what, my boy?"
"When I claimed to have killed something." He then hissed something that only Voldemort understood, causing the evil wizard's eyes to widen in fear.
The head of sixty foot basilisk appeared from behind a large tree.
60. Another bunny by Killer07
Harry and Voldemort were in a duel that was running all over Hogwarts castle.
Finally wearing his young adversary's energy down, Voldemort disarmed Harry. Smirking, he was standing at the top of a staircase and looking down at his beaten foe laying on the landing below.
Voldemort forgot that Hogwarts was, in several ways, sentient. More importantly, she was very protective of her students.
Before the Dark Lord could say another word, the staircase lurched into motion, throwing him off his feet. At which point he was pounced upon by one-hundred twelve house-elves, seventeen ghosts, six suits of armor, and a poltergeist.
61. Bunny by Art
In front of Harry's horrified eyes, Wormtail dropped the infant-sized Voldemort into the bubbling cauldron.
Before Wormtail can perform the next step, the misshapen form that Voldemort was wearing, now a bright red, screeched in pain, pulled itself out of the cauldron, and fell to the grass. It immediately burst into flame.
Wormtail blinked down at the smoldering corpse. "Huh. Must had the flame set too high."
62. Another bunny by Art
Voldemort stared at the box of chocolates in suspicion. Who in the name of Merlin would send him chocolates and sign it "A Devoted Follower"?
Voldemort plucked the first chocolate out of the box and cast every detection charm he knew on it.
They all came back clean.
It was delicious.
The next chocolate went along the same path.
And the third. And the fourth . . .
By the eighth, Voldemort was slurring the detection spells due to the concentrated brandy in the mix.
By the twelfth, he wasn't even paying attention to the results of the detection spells.
He should've.
63. Bunny inspired by Art. His suggestion was very different, but it sparked this bunny.
During the course of the running fight in the Ogden's distillery, Harry landed a lucky Bludgeoning Hex on Voldemort. The Dark Lord fell into a large vat below the walkway that he and Harry had been dueling upon.
One of the Death Eaters stopped and tried to help his Lord and Master out. Voldemort playfully fought him off and drown ten minutes later.
64. Bunny series by Art.
Homing Portkey: A Portkey that will transport its passengers to a person instead of a location. Experimental. Potentially Dangerous. Contact the Department of Mysteries.
A) Harry had just taken his first skydiving solo jump from 4000 meters when he heard the pop of an arriving Portkey.
B) "So, Charlie, this is a bull Norwegian Ridgeback. Are they as temperamental, high-strung, and territorial as I've heard?" Harry heard an arriving Portkey from near the dragon.
C) Harry was scuba diving off the Great Barrier Reef, and keeping a respectful distance from three great white sharks, when he thought he heard the sound an arriving Portkey through the water.
D) Standing in Pamplona, Spain, Harry watched the end of the street tensely. The sound of arriving Portkey was lost in the sound of the approaching herd of bulls.
E) "Now THIS is what whitewater rafting is all about!" The American teenagers shouted agreement as they all fought to keep the raft upright. Harry didn't even hear the arriving Portkey over the roaring water.
F) "If you look out the port side, that's the left, Mr. Potter, you can see the Kilauea crater of the still active Mauna Loa volcano." Neither Harry nor the tour-guide pilot heard the arriving Portkey over the sound of the helicopter engine.
<Additional bunny by Panaka>
G) Harry is free-hand climbing El Capitan, two hundred feet above anything that could vaguely be called a ledge and five hundred feet above the ground, when he hears the arriving Portkey.
<Additional bunny by dontbe_vain>
H) Harry, having gone to visit his parents grave, passed a tombstone with the name Harry Potur inscribed. Having not specified which Harry Potter, the sound of the Portkey was muffled
by the dirt under the deeply buried coffin.
<Additional bunny by dontbe_vain>
I) Harry stood by the railing along with a dozen other people in matching yellow rain jackets. The sound of the arriving Portkey was drowned out by the rushing waters of Niagra Falls.
65. Another bunny by Killer07
"Leave the child alone!"
Voldemort didn't even look up, but Lucius Malfoy did. Putting on his best sneer, he addressed the muggle, "And you think you can stop us? Who do you think you are?"
"Bruce Banner. Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."
66. Another bunny by Killer07
According to the plan, Voldemort would portkey into the storeroom of Flourish and Blott's to lay some traps, while his other Death Eaters would apparate in once he signaled them.
Unfortunately for him, his portkey deposited him into the cage containing the remaining (near starved) editions of The Monster Book of Monsters.
67. Another bunny by Killer07
"Hey, Bub, leave the poor kid alone!"
Voldemort looked over to see a well-muscled muggle with a cigar stride toward him.
A Killing Curse solved that problem.
At least temporarily.
Voldemort was amazed to see the muggle stand back up within a minute.
Another Killing Curse put him back down.
He got back up again.
Blasting Curses, Cutting Curses, Flaying Curses, and many other types of dark curses flew. Everything affected him temporarily, but he shrugged off all the effects within moments.
Finally within arm's reach, the muggle pulled a knife from who-knew-where and thrust it into Voldemort's chest.
"I don't know what kind of mutant you are, but that hurt," Wolverine informed him.
68. Another bunny by Killer07
Voldemort slowly opened his eyes. All the colors were more vibrant than before. All odors and sounds were likewise magnified. Despite not having a heartbeat, Voldemort felt alive for the first time in a very long time.
Still weak and in pain, he looked over toward where he could sense another of his kind. "The Turning was successful. As promised, the ritual to grant you immunity to sunlight will be delivered to you."
The other vampire smiled, bowed to Voldemort, and turned to the door.
Before he got there, though, a muscular black man wearing black clothing, a sword hilt over one shoulder, and miscellaneous other weapons on him entered the room calmly and shut the door behind himself. Both vampires stared at the man.
"Did I come at a bad time?" Blade asked in an emotionless tone.
69. Scene submitted by Draco664. Used with permission and posted without modification.
Neville gently teased the soil around the plant with his trowel. The leaves showed some signs of a rare root fungus, so it was imperative that he check it to ensure the root system was undamaged.
Gently, he pulled the plant out of the soil, noting with some concern that the root system, which looked remarkably like a baby human, had a distinctively unhappy look on its face. With an expression of intense discomfort, it screwed up its face and opened its mouth to wail.
Neville went to work, pleased that his earmuffs were working perfectly. Gently soothing the mandrake, he began plucking the fungi spores from around the mandrake's toes. Once done, he replanted the still-screaming, mature plant, ensuring the soil had the correct acidity and moisture before removing his earmuffs.
He turned around and gave a startled scream of his own. Lying in front of him were two black-robed figures, both with a blank expression on their faces. One, he instantly recognised as Bellatrix LeStrange. The other could only be V-V-Vol... You-Know-Who.
He blinked and looked back at the mandrake he had just been tending to.
"Huh, it looks like Harry *wasn't* the prophecised one after all."
70. Scene submitted by Draco664. Used with permission and posted without modification.
Voldemort looked around his gathered followers. With Potter still tied to the gravestone, he could afford to impart his displeasure with his followers. He was looking forward to hearing what their excuses were.
Before he could start, however, the gathering of the most feared wizards in the Wizarding World was interrupted.
A Muggle, well, a massive, exceedingly well built Muggle at any rate, wandered into the circle. His nude, glistening body on display to the world. The Death Eaters watched, dumbfounded, as the man with cold, dead eyes examined each of the wizards in detail.
Voldemort smirked. "Nice night for a walk?"
The man glanced back at the snake-faced wizard. "Nice night for a walk," he said tonelessly.
The Death Eaters all shared a chuckle at this idiot's ignorance of his dire situation. Macnair actually had the gall to say, "Wash day tomorrow. Nothing clean, right?"
The Muggle snapped his head round to look at MacNair. "Nothing clean, right," he repeated dutifully.
Lucius cleared his throat. "I believe this Muggle is a few sickles short of a galleon, my Lord."
The Muggle hadn't taken his eyes off MacNair, the only Death Eater in the circle who was around the same size as the Muggle. "Your clothes. Give them to me. Now!"
At his Lords gracious nod, MacNair slowly withdrew his wand. "Crucio!"
The Muggle looked down dispassionately at his chest where the spell hit.
ooOOoo
The nerve endings in its organic components were all reporting exceedingly high levels of stimulation. According to its databanks, it took severe damage for the nerves to light up like that. The data it was receiving easily placed the actions of the man into the 'threat' category.
Reacting to his programming the only way it knew how, the Terminator shifted into termination mode.
ooOOoo
Harry was taken to St. Mungos for evaluation that night. He'd obviously been severely traumatised psychologically after witnessing what appeared to the investigating aurors to be the work of a wild animal, which tore apart a dozen wizards, all of whom were well placed in high society.
Oh, and one unidentified part-human, whose remains were simply incinerated. No point wasting an investigation on such a worthless being.
71. Believe it or not, I occasionally DO have my own bunnies still.
"Sectumsempra," Voldemort hissed at a random muggle. They were on a raid in London, so terror was the order of the day instead of a more structured attack.
A huge, slicing wound opened up on the muggle's upper chest. Instead of falling over and messily dying, though, the muggle simply stopped and turned toward Voldemort and his Death Eaters. As he walked over, he pulled a small cylinder from his pocket. After pressing a button, a ice pick like extension came out of one end.
As the wounded muggle approached the amazed Voldemort, the Dark Lord noticed two things.
First, the blood coming out of the cut wasn't red but was rather black.
Second, Voldemort's eyes were beginning to burn.
72. Bunny by darthloki
"Serpensortia!" Draco Malfoy cried, pointing his wand at Harry in Lockhart's dueling circle.
The again-disembodied Voldemort was floating, undetectable, in the room. Seeing a chance, the quickly possessed the conjured snake.
Harry, in a panic at being suddenly confronted by a large cobra, cast a spell that he'd spotted in Fred's D.A.D.A. book. "Reducto!" he shouted.
Like most spells, this one reacted to extreme emotion.
Chunks of grilled snake rained down on the audience for the next thirty seconds.
73. Another bunny from Killer07
Furious with his failure to goad Dumbledore into killing Potter, Voldemort Summoned Lestrange to him and triggered his escape portkey.
Unfortunately for him, he was unaware of one security measure a subset of the Department of Mysteries had put over the building.
Instead of the steady pull of a regular portkey trip, he felt a sudden wrenching sensation as if the portkey had been redirected. But that was impossible, wasn't it? When the trip ended, he saw a bright flash of light and then nothing.
The next morning, The Daily Prophet ran two stories. One was a break-in and a running fight that had resulted in the arrests of eleven Death Eaters.
The second article consisted mostly of a picture. As all wizarding pictures, it moved and ran in a loop. This particular loop lasted perhaps a full second. It was Voldemort and Bellatrix Lestrange appearing wearing totally gobsmacked expressions. They were immediately pulled downward by gravity into the Veil of Death.
74. Another (modified) bunny from Killer07
Wormtail was preparing his Master's meal in the old Riddle House's kitchen. He was regretting his decision to search our his Master and was desperately awaiting June and the end of the Tri-Wizard Tournament.
Sighing once again, he noticed a movement out of the corner of his eye. Spinning in place, he saw a small animal of some sort, vaguely reminding him of the teddy bear he'd seen young Ginny Weasley own years ago. Brown, small, and cuddly looking, it had a stripe of hair sticking up from its head. "Shoo," he told it.
It merely tilted its head and looked at him.
Instead of hurting the thing, Wormtail merely shot sparks at it.
Giving a frightened squeak, it ducked into the pantry.
Chuckling, Wormtail gathered the food and left the room, absently noting it was near midnight.
Once he'd left, the little creature poked its head out, now looking much angrier. Instinctively, it also knew it was close to midnight. Looking around, it spotted both food and a bowl of water. A truly evil grin formed on its small face. "Mogwai," it muttered, moving toward the water.
75. Another bunny by Killer07
"Master, I cannot catch one," Quirrell panted.
"Then catch one of the foals, fool," Voldemort hissed from the back of the poor man's head.
This was a mistake.
The entire herd of unicorns had been nearby, each cooperating to keep the Evil One from catching one of their own. Unicorns are very intelligent animals, and so understood what the Evil One had said. With such a direct threat to one of the foals, they stopped running and all turned toward the threat.
Powerful as Quirrell had become after letting Voldemort possess him, he was not a match for a dozen angry unicorns attacking all at once. Not with their natural resistance to Dark Magic and their magical, long, and most importantly sharp, horns.
76. Another bunny from Killer07
Voldemort chuckled evilly as he led Bellatrix and Lucius to Potter's new home. After coming of age, the impudent brat had immediately moved out from under the blood wards that Dumbledore had set up at his aunt's home and bought a small mansion. Unfortunately for him, the defenses were far inferior.
Smirking in anticipation, Voldemort threw open the front door and strode into the (admittedly impressive) entrance hall.
Harry Potter awoke the next morning. After finishing his morning routine, he went downstairs toward the kitchen. Passing through the entrance hall, he stopped to scratch the near head of his new pet, a housewarming gift from his oldest magical friend. "Hiya, Fluffy. What've you been up to?"
77. Another bunny from Killer07
After disabling his troll, Quirrell/Voldemort entered the next chamber.
"A logic puzzle, Severus?" Quirrell hissed. He read the note, over several times, muttering under his breath. He strode back and forth, pausing to look at the bottles lined up. After a short time, he gave a decisive nod.
Taking one of the squat bottles in hand, he confidently drank the contents.
He chose poorly.
78. Another bunny from Killer07
Voldemort looked around his throne room in utter disbelief.
Blown out walls, partially collapsed portions of ceilings, furniture reduced to kindling.
And then there were his Death Eaters.
Every one of them was dead.
Broken necks, spells from each other, muggle bullet wounds, one even had a grappling hook imbedded in his chest.
Voldemort finally looked down at his own chest. A single bullet hole was slowly leaking blood down his robes.
Powerless to change events, Voldemort looked up at the single muggle standing in the room with unbridled hatred. He then fell over dead, never to rise again.
The muggle in question looked over at one pile of wreckage that was recently a hugely expensive car. "Q is going to kill me," James Bond muttered.
79. Another bunny from Killer07
"Harry."
Harry Potter's attention was pulled up from his summer homework. He was surprised to find a ghost in his room. He was further surprised to realize that it was . . . "Mum?" he asked in
shock.
She smiled. "Yes, sweetheart. I just got back to this plane a minute ago. I was drawn to our shared blood, that's how I found you so quickly."
"If you found me by my blood -"
"Yes, I can find him." She gave a grin that made Harry uneasy. "Has anyone warned you that the quickest way to anger a woman is to hurt her son? Well, Riddle did just that and my
response is about sixteen years overdue. Your father, Sirius, and I have been working on this spell for a while, you see . . ."
80. Another bunny from Killer07
Voldemort raised his wand to curse another one of these abnormal muggle children when he saw something moving toward him. Turning, he saw a distinguished looking man in a wheelchair
approach. They stared at each other, both ignoring the unusual and fantastic fight occurring around them.
Voldemort felt something in his mind and raised his Occlumency shields. It didn't help.
I've no idea what you are, but I cannot allow you to continue hurting the children, no matter how much it pains me to do this to you, a voice in his head spoke.
With that, Charles Xavier settled down to mind wipe all the black robed men, starting with the disfigured one before him.
81. Bunny by Lurk
Voldemort looked with distaste at the object in his hand. "It is a adaptation of a muggle idea, you say?"
"I am afraid so, My Lord," Wormtail simpered. "However, the producers are purebloods and the items are as powerful as almost any Explosion Hex without the energy draining effect.
"If I may, My Lord, you use it by first grasping it like -"
Voldemort gave him a withering glare. "Fool. I do not require instruction for such a simple item. Leave me."
Wormtail left.
The explosion less than a minute later brought down that wing of Malfoy Manor.
Voldemort really should have read the short instructional pamphlet that came with the case of Weasley's Super Deluxe Explosive Grenades.
82. One of those now-rare Original Ideas by Crys (tm)
In the midst of a battlefield, Voldemort stood over the dead body of the Boy-Who-Finally-Bloody-Died, cackling insanely. Finally pausing for breath, he looked around. Every Death Eater he
could see was dead or immobilized.
He shrugged. It didn't matter. He was victorious over the Potter brat.
He grinned hideously at Dumbledore. "I have won, old man. You know this means I'm immortal." He turned to the rest of the Light defenders and spread his arms wide. "I am
immortal!" he cried to them. "I have beaten your savior. You cannot win! Just to prove that I cannot be beaten, I will allow you all to curse me, right now!"
23 Stunning Spells, 52 Cutting Curses, 16 Blasting Curses, and 2 Killing Curses came flying at him.
Voldemort had miscalculated. The prophecy that Dumbledore had heard seventeen years previously referred to two people who wouldn't be born for another two hundred years.
83. Another Original Idea by Crys (tm)
"Hey, Tommy! Catch!" Harry Potter threw the fake Slytherin locket at his arch nemesis.
Voldemort, thinking Potter had just thrown one of his own horcruxes at him, snaked out a hand and caught it.
Only to feel the jerk behind his navel sensation of an activating portkey.
84. Another Original Idea by Crys (tm)
Seventeen year old Tom Riddle, about to start his seventh year at Hogwarts, decided that he needed to see what a real battlefield looked like.
Fortunately, there was one relatively close by.
He apparated to France and followed the flow of people until he found a battle underway. Again apparating to a nearby hill, he found a place with good visibility and settled down to watch, paying particular attention to tactics on both sides of the battle line.
On the east side, a German sniper was speaking with his lieutenant. "Sir? What do you make of that?" He pointed.
"Black robes? What are the Americans thinking? No matter. Whoever he is, he's obviously an enemy. Can you hit him from here?"
"Yes, sir."
"Then do so."
85. Another bunny by Killer07
Voldemort entered the quaintly named Shrieking Shack, knowing from Wormtail that there was an unguarded entrance to the Hogwarts grounds in the building
He really should've checked if Remus Lupin was in the area this night of the full moon.
86. Another bunny by Killer07
Harry and Voldemort faced each other as the Battle of Hogwarts raged around them.
During a moment of lull during their duel, an American style phone booth, of all things, fell from the sky and landed directly atop the Dark Lord.
Before Harry's incredulous eyes, two teens stepped out of the booth and looked around.
"Whoa, dude," Bill observed.
"Totally bogus," Ted agreed.
"Excellent," Harry whispered.
87. Another bunny by Killer07
Quirrell/Voldemort stared at the sphinx. What in the name of Merlin?
"What is your answer?" it asked calmly.
"Get out of my way, creature."
The sphinx's eyes narrowed. "You know the rules I work under. Answer or retreat."
He didn't bother answering, instead casting a Killing Curse.
The entity collectively known as Magic didn't take kindly to him doing that. After all, the sphinx was loyally fulfilling the purpose for which it was born.
Riddle wasn't.
88. Another bunny by Killer07
Voldemort stood over the dead body of Harry Potter. "I am immortal! I am a god among men!" he shouted to the downcast Light wizards who were watching.
A bright flash of light and a deafening crack of thunder stopped everyone in the tracks. When the dust settled, Voldemort was gone. In his place was a small crater with a scrap of papyrus. Written were the words, "These posers are getting really annoying."
89. Another bunny by Killer07
Just as Wraith-Voldemort got control of his latest wizard host, he heard, "Obliviate!"
Gilderoy Lockhart walked out of the hut, already planning on how to write the next chapter in his latest book.
90. Another bunny by Killer07
"Hey, stop that!"
Voldemort looked up from his spot of muggle-torture to see a muggle walking toward him wearing a very elaborate pair of sunglasses.
Is that rose quartz?
Deducing from their unique shape and color that they were valuable, Voldemort summoned them off the muggle's face.
Scott Summers wasn't expecting that, and as he was looking right at the pale, skinny guy . . .
91. Another bunny by Killer07
"Riddle."
"My Lord Grindewald. How may I serve you?"
"Apparate to these coordinates. My spies tell me that the Americans are testing a new weapon. Learn what you can of it, and report back to me. Steal it if possible."
"It will be done, Master."
Several apparition jumps later, Riddle found himself in a desert, looking at a sign. He heard a muggle siren blaring, but he ignored it, instead reading the sign.
Welcome to Alamogordo, New Mexico
Test Site "Trinity"
92. Another bunny by Killer07
Tom Riddle, seeker for Slytherin, was desperately chasing the snitch. Unfortunately for him, he lost his grip and fell from his broom.
It was only a twenty-foot fall, so neither the game referee nor the school nurse thought much of it until the young man didn't stand up again.
By the time they realized something was wrong and they got to him, he'd died.
It was ten minutes before they looked in his mouth, to find he'd choked to death on a golden snitch.
93. Another bunny by Killer07
Voldemort used a homing portkey and found himself standing in front of Potter and his mudblood friend. They were all standing in the Forbidden Forest.
Voldemort already had his wand out. The wide-eyed Harry did not.
"Now you will die," Voldemort stated simply.
He had no idea the fatal blow was coming. Harry and Hermione had been visiting Grawp and the giant took great exception to death threats to his Hermy.
94. Another bunny by Killer07
Voldemort used a homing portkey and found himself in front of Potter and one of his female friends.
"Well, if it isn't your mudblood protector," he sneered at the two teens.
"Vicissitudo sordesco!" Hermione cast at Voldemort.
Both men stared at her for a moment. Without warning, Voldemort collapsed.
Harry blinked. "What'd you do?"
"Changed his blood to mud."
95. Another bunny by Killer07
Norbert, as he was known to the humans, flew above the Hogwarts grounds and the fight they contained, following the directions of his Elder, who was in turn taking instructions from the human Charlie Weasley.
Norbert did as he was told until he caught sight of two humans that he'd known since his Hatching. He was pleased to see they were still together, at least as Nestlings if not as Mates yet.
Spiraling down to land near them, he came up short when he realized that another human, this one ugly by even their standards, was hurting them.
Well, time to put a stop to that!
96. Bunny by Crazy
He stalked through the forested land, a silent and almost invisible shadow flitting through what most humans would have considered a very dangerous forest indeed.
The humans called his people Predators for a reason, though.
At the moment, he was stalking one of the four-legged, one-horned, white animals. They were much more difficult prey than they looked at first inspection, providing a mildly amusing diversion until something more appropriate to his skills presented itself.
Just as he was about to fire, one of the humans from the nearby dwelling brought the animal down with a single flash of green light. Angry with the interruption of his hunt, the Predator watched as the human advanced and began to feed on the corpse.
Nobody stole prey from a Predator. And lived, anyway.
97. Bunny by Gullwhacker
"Really, Professor Flitwick, I would like a full on duel with you."
"Mr. Riddle, I must decline. Simply put, you cannot survive a full, unrestricted duel against me."
"Are you afraid?"
"That is not it at all! I am a dueling champion, Mr. Riddle. You are a student. Powerful and just recently named Head Boy, yes, but still only a student."
"You subhuman thing, I will duel you! Avada Kedavra!"
98. Another bunny by Killer07
Looking at the ruins of an irreplaceable Dark Artifact, Voldemort had finally had enough of Crabbe and Goyle's bumbling incompetence. "Avada Kedavra!"
Showing the type of luck granted only to small children and fools, both Crabbe and Goyle tripped and accidentally cast spells at that very moment.
Crabbe accidentally conjured a slab of granite.
Goyle accidentally put a Reflexive Charm on it.
99. Another (modified) bunny by Killer07
"Apparate to these coordinates. There is a small muggle village there. They're having some sort of gathering tonight, so they should all be gathered nearby. Kill everyone and destroy the village. Are there questions? No? Good." He apparated, followed by his followers.
Voldemort had forgotten the significance of November 5th and how it applied to the English muggles.
On top of that, he picked an extraordinarily poor place for his apparition destination.
Guy Fawkes Night is often called Fireworks Night or Bonfire Night, after all.
100. Another bunny by Killer07
Voldemort was as angry as he'd been since his resurrection. Failed raid after failed raid and now this? "Crucio! Avada Kedavra! Crucio!" His body was literally vibrating with rage as he repeatedly cast spells to punish his incompetent followers.
All of this put a tremendous strain on his body.
One thing he didn't know about the dark ritual that re-embodied him was that the "flesh of the servant" carried along with it the genetic material to re-create the entire body, which included any defects.
Wormtail had a weak heart.
So did Voldemort.